10 Things To Hate About Facebook

If you read one of my previous posts, you already know how much I love social sites like Myspace and Facebook. Well today we will go over 10 things to hate about Facebook!

1) Stupid Groups

Here's the big obvious one. Somebody over at Facebook thought having groups would be a good idea, and in theory it's true. The possibilities are endless! Local groups, singles groups, hobby groups, etc. However, the implementation went.. Well, different than they probably imagined.

I think the first retarded group that got my attention was "I'm going to watch the movie 2012 in 2014 and laugh". I mean seriously. Oh, then somebody figured out how to transfer email spam over to Facebook. Remember the days when you would get an email like this: "Little Timmy can't get a liver transplant until 5 billion of you people forward this to all your friends, and you'll have good luck for the rest of your life bla bla bla". Only on Facebook it's "Join this here group and captain buckwheat will name his firstborn child Megatron." Wow!

2) "Facebook isn't for socializing"

While it's possible this applies to only me, somehow I doubt it. People like to use Facebook for all sorts of things (mostly superficial), but they won't even reply to a message. Whether on their wall or a personal message, it just seems like Facebookers are more concerned with leveling up in their gang-wars game. The younger people are even worse! It's like going to a bar and playing with the poker machine all night instead of talking to people.

3) Let's All Use The "Siblings" Section to Put More Friends

Oh yeah people let's not use Siblings to put our actual brothers and sisters. Instead we will turn it into a "mega-friend tab" and just throw like 20-30 people in there for no reason. Remember everyone "it's cool" to not use something the way it was intended.

4) Tagging People in Phony Pictures

Since college failures and high school punks only have 1000+ pictures of themselves, they are forced to improvise and tag everyone in all sorts of "creative" ways. How about a giant image full of phrases like "the funny guy" and "drama queen". Let's just tag people in these pictures to show how much we care, then when others look through their pictures, they have to endure tons of spam images where somebody is tagged as a phrase. Woot!

5) Single Mothers

Single mothers and new mothers want the ENTIRE WORLD to know how awesome their kids are, by posting no less than 5000 pictures of them. They usually avoid posting pictures of themselves, and even use their kids pictures for their own profile! Argggh! The worst thing is in many cases the single mothers are the best looking, so who wants to look through 500 pics of their kids? I wonder if people are seriously that full of themselves that they think every moment of their kid's life must be on film for the world to see??

6) Really, Really Bad Applications

While Facebook owns Myspace pretty hard, the apps are horrendous. Most of them get obscenely low ratings such as one or two stars, and serve no better purpose than to spam everyone with ads and website links. Applications are all viral on Facebook. Once one person is tricked into installing it, they are encouraged to send it to all their friends in return for crappy little bonuses.

Hmmm, it kind of reminds me of dating sites! Have everyone go through the free signing up part, and then make them think there are tons of active users, when really they're just other people going through the free stage. When you finally get suckered into paying, most of the profiles are ghosts! Nice!

7) Birthdays

Facebook reminds you of people's birthdays, which is REALLY annoying. Especially for us users who log in every day. We have no excuse to miss somebody's birthday when it comes up on the homepage all the time. I am then forced to go buy the person a Subway gift card so that they can "eat smart".

8) Facebook Loves to Remind You That You're Single

From Valentines day to just the plain old "Relationship Status", Facebook is always thinking of ways to remind you that you're single. There are also plenty of worthless applications that try to exploit your singleness to get you to install them. Once you sign up, you'll quickly realize how well online dating works. This isn't the 1990s anymore!

9) Lack of Music Support

If you visit social sites from other countries (like Vkontakte in Russia), you'll quickly realize how bad Facebook fails when it comes to music and media. This is of course because of our wonderful friends in the music industry, who make it practically impossible to hear a song without jumping through their idiotic hoops. Instead, we're blessed with games that let you manage a virtual farm. I'm sure the Russians are jealous!

10. Friend "Suggestions"

The best part of signing into Facebook is getting all kinds of "recommendations" on friends you should add, based on their proximity to your other friends. This is a lot of fun, especially when it starts suggesting I add friends from China and the Philippines. I'm not sure how the hell some of these people get suggested. Some of them aren't even in English! Click them away and they come back the next time you refresh the page or sign in!